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Spring-Cleaning “They’re saying you can’t put it into humans. Not even into Jared. But have they even tried?”: A week in the life of Lysol’s favorite spokesman*

April 27, 2020

A Bug’s Life The author of Contagion delivers an open letter from a tiny invader who goes by the name Coronavirus

Going Green No, not that kind of green! A week in the life of an envious (and totally inadequate) social distancer*

April 13, 2020

Wellness Formula The relaxation guru behind the cool-as-cucumbers personalities of Rudy Giuliani and Gordon Ramsay reveals her secrets for keeping loose and carrying on

April 9, 2020

Donald Trump’s Completely Unverified Coronavirus Diary* Melania makes a run for an epicenter of the coronavirus, Boris reports in from his sickbed, and the president struggles to distinguish between “She” and “Xi”: a week in the life

April 6, 2020

“Hope You Are Well.”
(And Flush!)
A headshaking selection of “concerned” e-mails we’ve received

“Kanye West Put the Kardashian Sisters to Open the Dictionary!” Recent headlines and quotations from international glossies, courtesy of Google Translate

The Canadian Scenes from what should be Martin Scorsese’s next film

Films for Discerning Audiences The best movies never get made. Time to put a stop to that

Achtweet! Useful German words for these difficult modern times

The Bob Project My 25-year quest to sneak Dylan references into absolutely everything

EPISODE VI: “Weekender Loonies and Sicko 212s!” A final missive from Lansy Everett, formerly of the New York Herald Tribune, Vanity Fair, Esquire, Vogue, Worth, and Harper’s Bazaar

Canadian Kama Sutra Happy New Year! Your long-awaited guide to romance north of the border is here

Master and Commander The U.S.S. Lincoln projects American sea power on a small speck off the coast of Newfoundland

EPISODE V: “Nothing Ever Changes in Palm Beach” A little more correspondence from Lansy Everett, formerly of the New York Herald Tribune, Vanity Fair, Esquire, Vogue, and Harper’s Bazaar

No, Virginia, There Isn’t a Santa Claus! Revisiting a Spy piece that proved, once and for all, scientifically, what no child wanted to hear