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“If we just hold our nerve, poorly lit homes filled with clutter will become ‘a thing.’”
“Bow before Oldroot: lord of the wood, wisest of trees, global lifestyle brand … ”
“This primitive communication device is all that’s left of what was once a thriving civilization.”
“Yup, looks like your bookcase is full. You might want to start thinking about getting a new one.”
“I’m sorry, but the correct answer is not ‘I’m sorry if you feel offended.’”
“Wow—he can walk on hot coals without even posting that he’s walking on hot coals.”
“They’ll bring the check without your full signature, Clive.”
“Statistically speaking, there’s got to be at least one woman in there who’s looking for the awkward, sensitive type.”
“There’s no bad cop. We just let social media pressure you into a confession.”
Seconds before the children find out that Aunt Patty uses the f-word …
“O.K., we’re through with the animal-testing phase.”
“True, we could be soaring through the emerald corridors of sunset. What’s your point?”
“It’s a proposal about an idea for a concept.”
“I wish there was a way to distinguish this flag from the ones they used on January 6.”
“Here, you forgot one.”
“Maybe we should keep working from home.”