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“They were apparently more advanced than we thought.”
“I told you it was too soon to ride the subway.”
“Now don’t do anything flashy with the money, like pay off all your student loans at once.”
“Wait—we can vote?”
“The irony is I’ve always considered myself a champion of the little guy.”
“No, you’ve got it right. Hammer second to last, then mace all the way to the outside.”
“Does the court promise to listen to me? Really listen?”
“Apparently removing my reproductive organs wasn’t enough.”
“Now get to chiseling.”
“Is this Orwellian or Kafka-esque?”
“Yes, I get it. You love him unconditionally and will welcome him with open arms always, but you have to admit he’s kind of the worst.”
“I thought when I got my Ph.D. things would be different, but I am still a chicken.”
“We can’t rule out Antifa.”
“Are you sure you wouldn’t rather just get the vaccine?”
“I’m really into this series. I am just not into you making a very poor attempt at copying their British accent every waking minute until we finish it.”
“Look at him, strutting around as though the last four years never happened.”
“Can I put you on hold? My country is on fire.”
“I picked the wrong year to start journaling.”