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“Think again. Is this perhaps how it really happened?”
“Let’s play hide-and-I-read-my-book.”
“I love working from home. I can make my own hours, and the ankle monitor is actually pretty comfortable.”
“It’s just one monkey at one typewriter, but we’ve given him an infinite need for validation.”
“I know I’m being nostalgic … it’s just not the skyline of my youth.”
“Oh, he’s just lucky, and a robot.”
“The moment we met, I knew he was the man I’d settle for.”
“Welcome, I’m—never mind, it doesn’t matter.”
” … two nations, under God … ”
“I thought we said no presents!”
“I got into coffee for the wordplay.”
“We have ways of making you small-talk.”
“Where has this plain white T-shirt been all my life?”
“‘Oil and acrylic on canvas, but may also contain traces of peanut.’”
“When did constantly making pictures of your food become a thing?”
