“Sorry, I can’t make it tonight—I have too good a parking spot.”
Small Talk
“Whom shall I say is arresting?”
Small Talk
“Why do you put yourself under such pressure?”
Small Talk
“There he is. The ringer.”
Small Talk
“’Twas always folly, dear cousin. A humble parsnip could never be wed to an aubergine.”
Small Talk
“Yeah, I’m at that awkward age where all my friends are starting families, or rehab.”
Small Talk
Small Talk
“As long as you don’t sign anything in blood you should be O.K.”
Small Talk
“He’s so co-dependent, I usually board him, but the conference is only three days. Just make sure to let him out from nine to five to do his business. Oh—and treats are in the liquor cabinet.”
Small Talk
“Your three o’clock moved to two o’clock, your two o’clock moved to one o’clock, and your one o’clock said you’re fired.”
Small Talk
“I just want to take a minute today to acknowledge all of the guys out there named Bret who are too shy to correct the people who think their name is Brad.”
Small Talk
Small Talk
Small Talk
Small Talk
“Sorry, but once all that white entitlement permeates the fabric you really can’t get it out.”
Small Talk
Small Talk
Sociopathic canary in a coal mine
Small Talk
“I’m only going to worry if they start getting smaller again.”
Small Talk
“Canada geese.”
Small Talk
“There’s a sexual favor in it for you if you don’t utter the word ‘impeachment.’”
Small Talk
“O.K., he looks pretty stable—switch the middle screen back to the Super Bowl.”
Small Talk
“Let the record show the defendant pleads, ‘O.K., boomer.’”
Small Talk
“Is there something on my face? I’ve never had anybody watch this demonstration before.”
