“New Year’s resolutions are fine, but we should really focus on our squad goals.”
Small Talk
“Oh wow, Countdown to End Times calendar. No, Dean, I don’t already have one. Um, Happy New Year to you too.”
Small Talk
Small Talk
“I just got something off his registry.”
Small Talk
“What I’m hearing is that you love them, but, in the future, you’d like me to prioritize bags of money.”
Small Talk
“Ironically, all the guys from the hunting lodge were on the ‘Nice’ list.”
Small Talk
“I couldn’t make it here, so I’m going to try Boston.”
Small Talk
“If Basquiat painted it, you wouldn’t say the naïveté seems forced.”
Small Talk
Small Talk
“Oh, no, Tom is drunk.”
Small Talk
“Today was absolutely horrific. I just need to go relax with a cup of tea and a true-murder podcast.”
Small Talk
“So now I guess I’ll have to meet your friends.”
Small Talk
Small Talk
“Wait, all the screaming, and cheering, and swearing—you’ve been faking liking football the whole time?”
Small Talk
“Sir, your sitting here and drinking coffee while simply musing is making our guests uncomfortable.”
Small Talk
“I can’t believe I waited this long to get a financial-support animal.”
Small Talk
“I wrote, self-published, and remaindered it myself.”
Small Talk
Small Talk
“I begged you not to drink all that blood. Now you’ll just have to hold it until sunset.”
Small Talk
“ … and the sales call was coming from inside the house!”
Small Talk
“We took the Atlantic.”
Small Talk
“I never remember, do you brine before or after you get attached to him?”
Small Talk
“He’s got the ball, he’s at the 30, the 20, the 10, he’s running past the end zone, he’s leaving the stadium, he’s meeting his wife at the train station, they’re getting on the 3:27 to Hudson Station and buying a small home near the Catskills, they’re raising a family, they’re watching their kids grow old, he’s getting sick, he passes away peacefully in his sleep, he’s at his funeral—and folks—it’s a beautiful ceremony! What a game!”
