It was a week for the (Dark) Ages: Donald Trump’s runaway victory with 59.4 percent of your vote reflected just how spectacularly he outdid even himself, beginning with the feces-dump video and ending with the pardon of his convicted crypto business partner, which he justified to a CNN reporter this way: “You know nothing about nothing. You’re fake news … I gave him a pardon at the request of a lot of very good people.” In between: also pardoned George Santos, flip-flopped (again) on Vladimir Putin, had a tariff-producing tantrum over a Canadian TV ad, demolished much of the White House, demanded a $230 million extortion from the Justice Department, and continued airstrikes on small boats carrying drug smugglers (or possibly fishermen). “I think we’re just gonna kill people that are bringing drugs [Editor’s note: or fish] into our country,” he said. “O.K.? We’re going to kill them. You know? They’re going to be, like, dead. O.K.?”
For the record, the next three finishers were: Meghan “DS” Markle, 10.7 percent; the erstwhile Duke and Duchess of York, 9.1 percent; and single-cell organism Mike Johnson, 8.8. percent. On to this week’s poll, but first:
