Anne Glenconner, 92, was brought up at Holkham Hall in Norfolk, the eldest of three daughters of the Earl and Countess of Leicester. She was a maid of honor at the late Queen’s coronation and a lady-in-waiting to Princess Margaret. Her first memoir, Lady in Waiting, detailed the abuse she suffered at the hands of her late husband, Colin Tennant, and the deaths of two of her sons. Her new book about the joy of picnics includes contributions from Graham Norton and Rupert Everett, among others. She lives in Norfolk.
Punctuality is very important. If people are late, you think maybe they’ve forgotten and it worries the hostess. You don’t want to worry the hostess.
The secret to a good picnic is where it is. Try to go near a pond or river because of the white wine. It cools it down.
I can’t sit on the ground, I’m 92. I prefer a chair of some sort.
At Princess Margaret’s picnics you had to have a table, ideally indoors, and bring your butlers. We had a wonderful picnic at the Tower of London amid the Crown Jewels.
The Princess of Wales is fantastic. Fergie, maybe less so. I think she’s quite suited to Andrew. She must be, because they live together.
The late Queen never put a foot wrong. She was criticized when she didn’t come down to London after Diana died, because she was with the grandchildren. Well, I would have been with the grandchildren.
Once you start thinking, “I can’t be bothered,” that’s the thin end of the wedge. You’ve got to come out and crack on.
I was hooked on EastEnders, so I had to stop watching it.
I have a mobile but it’s switched off. The only way people can get hold of me is either a landline or postcards.
I was married for 54 years to somebody who was impossible to live with.
I love Mick Jagger. He said to me, “Anne, I hear I’m in your book.” I said, “No, Mick, of course not.” I mean, there is a musician with a craggy face, but…
Celebrities and royalty feel safe on Mustique. [Her husband bought the island in 1958.] If you arrive at the airport with long lens cameras, you’re told to get back on a plane.
My life was making things OK for Princess Margaret and my dear husband. Anticipating my husband’s rages, I got used to them.
Queen Elizabeth’s coronation was the most marvelous day of my life. Norman Hartnell had been to Sandringham with ten different designs for her dress. Princess Margaret told me they sat in a bedroom and the models came out of the bathroom. Her dress had a daffodil for Wales on it and he was told it had to be a leek. The Queen said, “Gels! I’ve got a leek on my dress.” We thought she meant something else. We were horrified.
When my son Henry got aids, a lot of my friends suddenly couldn’t come to stay. Princess Margaret always came and she hugged Henry. She came to the Lighthouse [a center for people living with HIV/aids] long before Diana.
You never get over the death of a child.
I’ve got a huge gay following. Young men write to me to say they find it difficult to tell their parents. I say quite often your parents know. Did I know Henry was gay? I suspected, but he got married and had a son.
People of my generation are much tougher. We were brought up during the war.
I never turn the heating on. I put on a coat. I grew up in a stately home. There was no heating at Holkham at all.
I went on a diet when I was 17. I’d been to a finishing school and put on quite a bit of weight. When I got home, my mother was horrified and said, “Nobody’s going to look at you.” I got hold of a silver pill I saw advertised. I don’t know what was in it, I think it had a worm, but it worked.
I would love to have inherited Holkham. My father minded frightfully. I once said to him, “If I had a sex change, would that work?” He said, “No, I don’t think it would.”
Look at people when you’re talking to them. When my grandchildren stay they have to leave their telephone things somewhere else. Otherwise they don’t interact with people.
I’m the stiff upper lip of all stiff upper lips. I can’t bear people complaining about things. Deal with it!
People think one’s very privileged, but I’ve lost two children and a third had an appalling accident. I had a difficult husband, and I was left with nothing when I was 87.
I coped with domestic abuse as well as I could. If you’ve got friends, talk to them because then it becomes better, not shaming and secret.
I cooked my first meal when I was 86. It was a boiled egg and it was more or less inedible. I do everything myself now, all my own washing and cooking. It’s what’s kept me going.
Only grand people used to have memorial services. Now everybody seems to. I’ll have a funeral and that’s it.
Hilary Rose is a longtime columnist and features writer at The Times of London
