CLARKSON (voice-over): Me and my BIG MOUTH! So one day, I had this REALLY BRILLIANT IDEA! Yup, as ideas go—this one was TRULY BRILLIANT!!!! (Clarkson is seen staring at a blank wall, scratching his head.)

CLARKSON: Now, that’s what I call—A VERY BLANK KITCHEN WALL!
You know what? I’ve lived getting on for 60 years—but never in my life have I ever seen—A KITCHEN WALL QUITE THAT BLANK!!! It’s so blank it even makes the 70s TV panel show Blankety Blank seem—POSITIVELY BLANK!

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