Candlelight. The moon above. And, gazing deeply into your eyes, someone special who also officially qualifies as “part of your small circle of close contacts.”

That’s romance, and sex, in the coronavirus era, according to New York City Health Department guidelines. It should be noted that the fact sheet does attempt to accentuate the positive. Yes, “kissing can easily pass the virus,” and, sure, “COVID-19 has been found in the feces of people who are infected with the virus,” meaning that “rimming (mouth on anus) might spread COVID-19.” However—and here’s the beauty part—“there is no evidence that the virus has been found in vaginal fluid.” Also: “You are your safest sex partner,” so masturbate away, says New York City, “especially if you wash your hands (and any sex toys) with soap and water for at least 20 seconds before and after sex.” Maybe the city could go even further and provide a colorful illustrated chart, as Oregon has: “Get off while maintaining your distance,” enthuses the second panel.