SEASON 1, EPISODE 1: Series opens with young, 1970s Trump portrayed by Harry Potter’s Rupert Grint drenched in Hai Karate.
S. 1, E. 4: Royal Shakespeare Company dialect coach teaches three actors playing Trump to “O” their mouth into Trump’s signature rosebud-anus configuration.
S. 1, E. 6: Editor slaps in a clip of Melania walking to plaintive oboe solo whenever the episode needs “texture.”
S. 1, E. 8: Stormy Daniels (Downton Abbey’s Laura Carmichael) avoids sex with president by repeatedly sitting on the Oval Office’s Diet Coke button.
S. 1, E. 8: Scene of artisanal-looking Space Force space suit being inflated is intercut with plastic surgeon telling president he could Botox his hands to normal size.
S. 1, E. 9: Producers turn down actual Trump family members’ requests to play Charlottesville white supremacists.
S. 1, E. 10: Montage of president drinking bleach sees the color of his skin shift from rich Corinthian to sun-damaged peignoir.
S. 2, E. 1: Director heightens Old Trump’s elaborate ramp-walking sequence by filming at terrifying suspended walkway over Yangtze River.
S. 2, E. 1: Show’s affectionate look at father-child relations is undercut when aide’s mention of Eric Trump causes president to ask, “Which one is he?”
S. 2, E. 3: Scene of protesters being tear-gassed for Old Trump’s Bible photo op is intercut with scene of Kimberly Guilfoyle being spray-tanned.
S. 2, E. 5: Scene of Melania angrily glue-gunning sequins onto Christmas-tree bulbs is intercut with scene of Russian prostitutes joylessly peeing on a bed at the Moscow Ritz-Carlton.
S. 2, E. 10: Old Trump and a symbolic stag pause their stately procession out of the White House for individualized bellowing, bowel movements.
S. 2, E. 10: Symbolic stag gambols idly around petting zoo while seething fellow resident Old Trump glares from inside his metal cage.
Henry Alford is a New York–based writer and the author of And Then We Danced
