One of the tightest Attention-Whore Index finishes ever. Continuing to do what he does best—denigrating a nation he professes to love, insulting its citizens (especially, sadly, the too credulous ones) by feeding them lie upon lie—Donald Trump won with 24.8 percent of your vote. It was his fifth straight A.W.I. victory. His spouse, Melania Trump, with only some P.R. for her memoir to offer up, was nevertheless a close second with 22.7 percent. Quite a talented household.
Third place went to the slick, children’s-car-seat-averse, fact-checking-phobic J. D. Vance (18.1 percent), fourth to newly peripatetic Prince Harry (12.2 percent). And a hearty welcome back to the fold for onetime A.W.I. stars Russell Brand and Boris Johnson!
