Clarence Thomas, A.K.A. “The Quid Pro Quo Kid”
Bob Menendez, A.K.A. “The Prince of Payola”
Current Title Held Supreme Court justice United States senator
Classification Lightweight Lightweight
Promoter Harlan Crow Egyptian government
Sparring Partner Ginni Thomas Nadine Menendez
Controversial Win KO’d Anita Hill (1991) Draw vs. U.S. Justice Department (2018)
Memorable Quote “Who has put pubic hair on my Coke?” Prosecutors “have misrepresented the normal work of a congressional office.”
Free Vehicle of Choice Prevost Le Mirage XL Marathon R.V. Mercedes-Benz
Preferred Method of Payoff Luxury vacations Gold bars

John Ficarra is the former editor of Mad magazine

Photos: Eric Lee/UPI/Alamy Live News (Thomas’s head); Prostock-Studio/Alamy (Thomas’s body); © Nancy Kaszerman/Zuma Press Wire/Alamy (Menendez’s head); Aleksandar Mijatovic/Alamy (Menendez’s body)