In the years before Tiffany Haddish hit the big time as a comedian and actress, she paid rent by working as a professional party dancer. “I did 11 years total, just killing it at the mitzvahs,” she has explained. “My job was energy producer. I get the party hype.” That skill is evident on-screen—especially in the two summer blockbusters she stars in, Haunted Mansion and Back on the Strip—as well as on the page. (Her 2017 memoir, The Last Black Unicorn, is a New York Times best-seller.) Rest is important for a seemingly tireless performer like Haddish. Here, she shares her lively nighttime routine.
When do you start getting ready for bed?
Whatever time I get home from work.
I take off all my street clothes and wash my body. Then I use a Neutrogena wipe, or some sort of makeup wipe, to take off all the makeup. I wash with whatever soap I put on my body.
What is your go-to product?
Coconut oil. I take that everywhere with me.
After I take my shower, if I notice any little bumps coming up, I’ll dip a cotton swab in vodka and put that on the little pimples and extringe [sic] it, if you will. It’s like a nice deep cleanse to get out any residue. But your skin will be dry, so then you gotta moisturize.
What do you drink before bed?
Usually a bunch of water because I’ve probably been drinking if I’m coming from a comedy show. I’ll water myself down.
What’s something you have to do before sleeping?
I pray—about five minutes of praying.
Then, I review my day. I might write down some notes of what happened that day, because maybe it was a little crazy, or maybe I came up with a new joke. Most of my jokes come in the morning or throughout the day, and I’ll [make voice notes] on my phone. I’ll be like, “Note to self, ‘write that,’” “Note to self, ‘this is funny.’” I’ll replay those and write them down before I go to sleep. By hand! You’ve got to write it by hand if you want it to stick. I’ll also write down what I want to dream about or what I want the next day to be.
Can you actually influence your dreams?
Yeah. I play YouTube videos for lucid dreaming or HZ tones [ambient noise] for healing the body. Or the sound of rain or manifest monies. It just depends on what happened that day.
What have you been dreaming about lately?
I’ve decided that after reading all my logs and books and stuff that my ancestors have been showing up in my dreams. And they definitely were showing up when I was in [Eritrea], Africa.
Since my grandma passed, she has shown up. She’ll be like, “Pose this way, do this, this is how you answer questions in the interview.” She’ll be grilling me. I wake up, and my body feels rested, but my mind is tired! I’m like, I need to go back to sleep, but then I can’t because grandma’s going to show up.
What’s the craziest advice she’s ever given you in a dream?
“Shut up. Just shut your mouth. Just be quiet.” She never yelled “Shut up” at me in my life. She yelled, “Be quiet. Not yet. Hold your lips together. Children are supposed to be seen, not heard.”
Are you a snorer?
I went into a sleep study, and I don’t have sleep apnea, per se. I do snore, though, which is a form of it. I’ve been doing pretty good with [not snoring] because I was taping my mouth shut for five or six months [with] the KT Athletic tape that you put on your knees and stuff. I’ve noticed in the last three weeks that I haven’t had to do that. I guess I’ve trained my mouth to stay shut.
How did you think of using tape?
[I searched on YouTube, ] “How to stop snoring naturally.” I think it’s helped me lose a lot of weight too because I’ve been breathing through my nose more and they say that’s how you lose weight, through breath. They also say it makes you more attractive to breathe through your nose. Mouth breathers are not necessarily the most attractive people.
Can you fall asleep anywhere?
If I’m tired, it’s a wrap. If I sit down and I’m not talking to anyone for more than five minutes, I definitely start to go away. I don’t know if it’s a meditative state or it’s nap time, but I definitely get into the dream realm.
Tell me about your mattress.
My mattress cost $1,400. I think it’s $1,200 now. I looked on Amazon and I was like, damn, I should have waited! I could have slept on an air mattress!
My bed vibrates, and the feet come up, and the head comes up—it’s basically a hospital bed. When I purchased it, the guy was like, “So, is it for your grandmother?” and I was like, “No, it’s for me.”
I don’t know what the brand is, and even if I knew what the brand was, I wouldn’t tell you because they’re not paying me.
When do you set it to vibrate?
When I’m writing my jokes, meditating, praying. I want to send out a vibration and bring back good vibes for me!
What do you do if you can’t fall asleep?
If I can’t sleep at all I’ll make some marijuana tea. And I will dance until I’m tired from dancing. Just turn on some music, whatever the music calls for, whatever moves me. When I’m super angry, it’s hard for me to sleep, and I will dance until I’m having a hard time breathing.
Jensen Davis is the Junior Editor at AIR MAIL
