What’s not just for socialists, vegans, and sad, mousy people anymore? What even sort of halfway rhymes with MAGA? That’s right—yoga! Kimberly G. here, reminding you that, with a toned body and a head geared for saving America, you can achieve crazy-great goals! Take me. As a former federal prosecutor, I’m a double threat: I practice law and I practice yoga. But work hard and you too can habeas a corpus like mine, LOL!
I’m doing almost all of my yoga at home these days. This is for a bunch of reasons. Firstly, every commercial yoga studio is full of perpetually aggrieved snowflakes with Ph.D.’s in Intersectional Basket Weaving. If I wanted to stretch and tone against a background of whining, I’d roll out my mat in Nancy Pelosi’s office. Secondly, practicing at home makes a bold statement about the garbage-like heaps and drifts of loaner mats that you find in studios; if you don’t own your own mat, folks, you are contributing to the welfare state. And thirdly: I got sick of my instructor telling me during Cobra Pose that “you don’t need to do the tongue, Kimberly!”
