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The Bob Project

My 25-year quest to sneak Dylan references into absolutely everything

Achtweet!

Useful German words for these difficult modern times

Films for Discerning Audiences

The best movies never get made. Time to put a stop to that

The Canadian

Scenes from what should be Martin Scorsese’s next film

Melania Diaries,
Part III

“Kanye West Put the Kardashian Sisters to Open the Dictionary!”

Recent headlines and quotations from international glossies, courtesy of Google Translate

“Hope You Are Well.”
(And Flush!)

A headshaking selection of “concerned” e-mails we’ve received

The New Commute

Donald Trump’s Completely Unverified Coronavirus Diary*

Melania makes a run for an epicenter of the coronavirus, Boris reports in from his sickbed, and the president struggles to distinguish between “She” and “Xi”: a week in the life

Wellness Formula

The relaxation guru behind the cool-as-cucumbers personalities of Rudy Giuliani and Gordon Ramsay reveals her secrets for keeping loose and carrying on

Going Green

No, not that kind of green! A week in the life of an envious (and totally inadequate) social distancer*

A Bug’s Life

The author of Contagion delivers an open letter from a tiny invader who goes by the name Coronavirus

Quote of the Week

Going Viral

Trump aide Kellyanne Conway explains the COVIDs

Quote of the Week

Spring-Cleaning

“They’re saying you can’t put it into humans. Not even into Jared. But have they even tried?”: A week in the life of Lysol’s favorite spokesman*

You Look Stimmmmulus!

Quote of the Week

Looking a Gift Horse in the Mouth

Not a day went by without Trump showing up late to his own coronavirus press briefings. A firsthand account explains what he was up to while the world waited …

In Search of Lost Food

Keeping track of the days may be a thing of the past, but when it comes to mapping out our next meal, it’s always go time

Interview with a Virus

In which he thanks his main man, the super-spreader in chief, Donnie Darkness

The Titanic Daily Task-Force Briefing

“Look, this is just, like, a really big ice cube, O.K.?”

Dog Days Come Early

Those interminable summer days have arrived well in advance of the season itself: 24 hours in the life of, well, everyone

The White House Bunker Diaries

Reports on a week of protests, straight from the unmasked source*